Dude you just made my day, I've been looking for someone to bounce thoughts back and forth with on this subject. With that, I'll break down your post and try to explain what I can.
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I'm going to step through my understanding of Bosons, and perhaps we can nut out exactly what this concept of 'mediating' forces really is. The first thing, I think, is to shed the whole 'billiard ball' conceptualisation of 'particles' and begin to think of what we call 'particles' as more like a certain state of energy flux - more fluid like.
Exactly. I really think that the billiard ball concept and many scientific 'truths' that used to be in the past puts most people in a mindset that there has to be solid concrete particles making circles around atoms and whatnot is naturally steering people away from what is a much more correct way of looking at things. This stigma also continues because it can be hard to comprehend all things being energy, and the billiard ball visualization makes things easier to grasp on to and works in some cases. As we can now see, though, it is not perfect. Through time, atoms were originally thought to be a soup of protons and other particles, then came the model with a central nucleus and circular orbiting electrons, and now electrons are pretty much considered probability clouds. While the electron has started to make the leap into a somewhat more abstract existence, and many other pieces (especially matter energy equivalence) point towards other things becoming less concrete, it just doesn't seem to be looked at that way.
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Coming back to the concept of mediating force, would you say perhaps that by 'mediating' force what is really meant is that the 'particle' actually is the force itself? I say this with the Photon in mind, as it is the Boson with which we are the most familiar. We talk about photons as discrete packages of light/energy, but what does that mean? We're told that a single photon can be cordoned off, but that at the same time light is a wave. So, is the discrete nature of a photon merely conceptual? Is it the smallest point at which you can pinch off a piece of energy and have it still be describable in the same way? Is talking about a 'mediator' of force merely a way of enabling a conceptual symbol to be attached to energy in a certain state of flux?
I think so. Mediating force to me is the biggest issue I have with forces in general. Ok, so we have these bosons, but what do they do that causes a force? Just the common 'they carry the force' doesn't cut it for me. It sounds like another case of grasping on to a billiard ball theory in order to better understand things. Yet at the same time it somehow exhibits wave-particle duality, which is somewhat confusing. This is something I'll have to think about more and read more on.
I'm getting lazy with the quotes. I think the fractal nature of the universe should be used as a great clue of what is going on at all levels. Your have clusters of galaxies, galaxies, solar systems, planetary systems, molecules, atoms, etc all looking fairly alike as you get smaller and smaller. Yet, what happens when you reach a point where there is no longer space?
Ah shoot, I have to go soon, so I'll comment on one more section
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Again I'm no physicist and I'm wide open to having things explained to me that I'm unaware of. Speaking of what I'm unaware of, could you indulge me a little and describe to me some of what I'm seeing in the Hydrogen Wave Function? If you would be willing to take the time I would love to understand that some more.
The wave function picture shows the probability of finding an electron in space given its energy state. It gets more complex, but the whiter the plot, the higher chance that you will find an electron there. There are four different types of functions depending on the energy level, S (the circular ripple one) P (looks like an

D (looks like an X kinda) and F (looks like a flower). This is all very brief, and I didn't end up with many new thoughts in this post. Hopefully I'll get them down later.